Mask

I've posted this before, but I think it's a great reminder just to see how far I've come in battling against these areas where Satan has attacked me. Don't get me wrong...these are still areas that I struggle in, but now I see them in a whole different light than when I wrote this poem in 2004. I know longer see my art and my writing as a weakness or something I'd want to trade to be more outgoing. And I'm learning to move past the fear, to renounce it, because fear is from Satan and I don't want him to have any part of my life. This poem shows the comparisons I placed on myself to someone, some ideal person, that I clearly didn't measure up to. But as I'm getting older I'm seeing myself more clearly as who God has made me and it's fun (and certaintly challenging at times) to see how God has wired me.

Mask

Take away my mask,
And leave me face to face.
With the world I do not fear,
Yet afraid of who I am.
Take away the paper,
And the grace with which I write.
Shatter all the pencils,
Leave me with words that I must speak.
Take away the paintbrush,
To face reality.
No more worlds of blissful delusion,
As I color what I see.
Take away this deep emotion,
That I truly don't belong.
Causing me to analyze everything,
Teach me how to have fun.
Take away these walls,
Built up so thick inside.
No bottled tears of joy or pain,
I want my heart upon my sleeve.